I followed that advice. I was obedient and disciplined. I taught myself art history, technique, I studied a variety of mediums and searched my soul through hiking and journaling, to find my perspective in art.
I have dedicated three solid years, and before that, two years, to incoprea i wish it well, but I cannot afford to continue. Both mentally and finanacialy.
We never really know how long we'll live and i'm almost fifty. I have to take some time off and let it go on its own. I will continue to explore and dream. There's really no way to shut that part off anyway.
When I rented this apartment near Taylor's Falls, I had high ambitions. Three years later, I am in debt to friends, family and of course, credit cards etc. I was one hundred percent focused on incoprea, my freelance illustration business, and working delivery routes for amazon in the blue truck when things got harder financially. The goal was to explore mediums and create work that wasn't necessarily commercial products, but works of meaning and experimentation.
My freelance work went from about eight thousand a month, twenty years ago to twelve hundred a month at the end, same hours. When you take into account, Adobe wants 60 bucks from me a month and my internet wants a 140 a month. AI is or will soon be capable of doing that and everything I was doing for clients. Rent was 960 3 years ago but is 1300 now.. you can see how i'm running negative. On top of this, I still have to pay some people back, and some of my family has needed help and care recently.
Do I feel bad about having a business for twenty years and having a I take over my market share? Would it do any good? As it was developing, I encouraged my clients to use it and taught them how to get similar results to what I was doing for them.
It is what it is. If I can step aside from my twenty year business and livelihood and see it for what it is; enabling people to create whatever they want in their own vision without gatekeepers, like myself. In the long run and aside for me, it is a wonderful thing!
I got a small storage unit that's climate controlled and secured to put all of my artwork in. I think the value will go up at some point, if not I can pass them along.
Most artists sell their work for very little, then when it does go up, they lose all of that differnce. For example, someone will buy a painting for fifty dollars and when that artist is more well known, they will sell that painting for six thousand dollars.But the original artist gets none of that. I understand an investor should get a return, especially when risk is involved, but at what multiple from the original artists income?
I'm probably going to disappear online for a while or forever. First time since nineteen eighty four without a computer (had to sell it for rent) I would like to say that it's freeing and wonderful, but I also miss it.
I guess one of the biggest things I learned from this project is that your perspective is the most valuable thing when it comes to meaning in art. People want to hear other people's truth.
Also that, Some people will always do evil things and other people will always highlight those evil things to advance their position that something wonderful is terrible.
Believe it or not When the internet was new, people had similar misunderstood aggressions towards it.
Also that, when in technology is new and little known, it is comprised mainly of pioneers, enthusiasts and optimists. Once the crowds start showing up, the advertisers and influencers soon follow and set up shop... poisoning the well.
I was interested in ai a decade ago, when I first heard about it. Keeping up to date on the news as they progressed. The ai art was malformed and misunderstood., I instantly related to that. In fact, as it started to get better towards the end and didn't have the errors and had somewhat less missunderstanding, I could relate less to it. Lol
I could have created work that was popular or trendy. I could have set up a patreon / gofunme etc, but that would all be ignoring my goal of producing the most high quality work from my perspective. And for that, I continue to pay the cost. And why shouldn't I? It's my vision and my projects. There are a lot more needs in the world than supporting my personal visions of art.
Unfinished business;
There are three books that I had outlined, but never finished and I wish that I had. Incoprea vol 2 may forever be in draft form. And there are three large oil paintings, I would say are like seventy percent done. To storage you go for now!
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